when I think of him waiting for me to come to him
when then was now

when it was he who ought to have
as if how now moves around goes on

an understanding of what conditions I would be barely able to bear
when now happened to be then now more than ever

and how it takes for feelings to turn into convictions
and how indecision breeds weakness

and how brutal weakness is and what tolls it takes
a conviction

after many attempts to forgive him
it became clear there was nothing to forgive

a style says conviction in indifference
conviction in style

a signal
like an army’s uniform

a battalion of men on motorcycles escaping their pasts without destination
an identification like

a hairstyle
like a list of names

the cold indifference of names carved in stone
dropped down a well

one of the few places sound goes to gain materiality
the well of a missile silo

maybe a well where the child fell in
and we saw you do it



Photograph © XoMEoX

White | State of Mind
Mark Doten | Five Things Right Now